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As we consider strategies for preventing child abuse during April, it’s important to remember that older kids and teens are at greater risk of childhood sexual abuse and exploitation than ever before. As these young people mature and experience more freedom and independence, they also need to be equipped with the knowledge to look out for themselves when parents and guardians aren’t around to protect them.
One of the greatest risks to our children as they grow into their teen years is sex trafficking. The average age at which young people become trafficked is 12-14, so our tweens, especially, need to be made aware of signs to look out for, as well as behaviors and activities that make them vulnerable.
Human trafficking is a billion-dollar business and one of the leading crimes in the world. Traffickers are crafty. They deceive, manipulate and control their victims with flattery and psychological games. Further, traffickers come in all shapes and sizes.
According to the Bureau of Justice Statistics, 92% of U.S. offenders charged for human trafficking in 2020 were male. However, recent studies suggest that women play an integral role in over one-third of trafficking operations, and are oftentimes harder to identify and prosecute. While these demographics are still being explored today, it is important to remember that anyone can be a trafficker or recruiter—men, women, young and old. Therefore, we must always be on guard.
Here are a some prevention strategies to share with your older children, which may help them understand why the first two warnings, especially, remain a part of your “house rules” even as they are growing older and gaining independence:
1. Don’t go out alone.
Whether just walking through the neighborhood or checking out the local mall, never go exploring on your own. The elementary rule that we’ve all heard, “use the buddy system,” rings true in almost every situation imaginable. Even when you need a break from your family and friends, remember to take someone with you. Traffickers prey on victims who appear to be alone and isolated from others.
2. Tell people where you’re going.
A simple practice when leaving home or school – especially if it’s not part of your normal routine – is to tell someone, potentially a parent or a close friend, the details of your day. Whether you choose to share your exact location or provide them with the name of a specific place, it’s essential to make others aware of this information. Another small, yet important detail to share is when you expect to return home or conclude planned activities.
3. Control what goes into your body.
As our kids begin attending parties or dating, they must remember to never consume unattended food and drinks. One common tactic used by predators is to ‘spike’ beverages with drugs in order to disorient their victims and induce compliance. A general rule to live by is to always be aware of the substances you put in your body. And, along these lines, refrain from consuming drinks and substances that could cause you to be less aware and in control.
4. Be aware of your surroundings.
Staying on guard and being aware of your surroundings is key. Here are just a few suggestions to help increase awareness levels:
1. Keep your eyes up! Don’t be stuck to your cell phone.
2. Be observant and take note of those around you. If you experience a stranger constantly staring at you or following you to different locations, tell someone.
3. Have a plan and identify an exit strategy.
4. Limit distractions. This makes you more vulnerable.
5. Trust your gut. If something or someone feels off, tell an adult or another friend about your concerns.
5. Know the signs of a human trafficker.
To better recognize these dangers, it is beneficial to know the common “red flags” associated with human trafficking. We’ve already established that human traffickers can be male or female, but one common strategy used to gain the trust of their victims is flattery and showering them with compliments or gifts. One of their common “lures” is to promise a modeling, acting job or social media influencer role, so we must caution our teens to be very leery of anyone approaching with such an offer.
Second, traffickers push physical boundaries and won’t take “no” for an answer. These individuals are oftentimes overpowering and very determined. Third, traffickers have developed popular tactics for luring their victims, such as using deception and seduction or by recruiting younger, trusted individuals to distract victims and gain their confidence. Let your kids know that, in these situations, it’s better to be rude and get themselves to safety rather than trust a stranger’s intentions.
Finally, if anyone witnesses or experiences any of these signs, they are encouraged to call the National Trafficking Hotline at 1-888-373-7888 to report human trafficking.
Another area where we need to give additional warnings to our kids is in their cell phone and smart device usage, as they start to become more involved on social media networks and online gaming. A vast majority – 89% – of sexual advances directed at children occur in Internet chatrooms or through instant messaging, and 1 in 9 children receive online sexual solicitation. Would your teen or preteen recognize whether their online connections were actually predators in disguise? They must never share personal information or their location, and if they are approached by someone who seems to be pursuing them, they need to let you know. Remind them that they will never get into trouble by coming to you! It’s always wisest and safest for them to only befriend those who are their similar-age friends in real life.
Our children are growing up and flexing their independent muscles, but they still need the advice and wisdom we have to share to keep them safe. Remind them of these topline strategies often: Always keep your eyes open, know your surroundings, avoid strangers or anyone who your intuition feels is dangerous, and never place yourself in an unfamiliar or unsafe situation. A commitment to following these simple life rules when outside your care and protection could very well save their lives, and will definitely relieve you of much worry and anxiety.
Elizabeth Fisher Good is the founder and CEO of The Foundation United, a catalytic platform to end sexual exploitation and trafficking through systemic change. Fisher Good is a passionate pioneer and inspirational thought leader with a desire to expose the root issue behind sex trafficking — childhood sexual abuse. Her book “Groomed” (HarperCollins, 2020) recounts her own story of loss, abuse, and triumph. Statistics and resources quoted above can be accessed at https://www.thefoundationunited.com/statsandresources.
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